This may come as a surprise to some people, but I love to budget. I enjoy the security a budget provides me. Knowing I have enough money to get through this month, and that next month I will also be okay, is a huge weight off my shoulders. For me, May is a three paycheck month. This is huge in getting back on my feet. Right off the bat, things are looking up. I can pay my deposits, pay the rent for June, and still be comfortable. Then, when the regular bills start rolling in during the month of June, I am ready, I am prepared, and I am going to be ok.
Not knowing what the utilities are going to run is a little intimidating and that’s ok. It just means I have to be prepared and be super frugal through the month of May. I won’t have a landline telephone, and my cell phone is a monthly prepaid so that expense is set in stone, the cable/internet (or whatever I decide on) will be set. I’m aware of most of the bills I have…it’s just getting through the first few months and figuring a few things out as I go.
Living on my own, I really have no idea how much water or electricity I actually use so I will be super conservative for now and hope that habit will stick. I’m not home during the day, and during the summer months the sun is up later than I am so I shouldn’t need a ton of lights until autumn comes. Boy 1 wants to alternate weeks with each parent this summer so we will see what I can make work there.
After church on Sunday I went to my friend’s house, when I walked in I told the hubby that I was only back to use them…he said, “Ya, free internet, figures.” I love it when people know me so well. The wife did homework for a while, I chatted with some friends online and posted a blog post and then she went to take a nap in her room and I fell asleep on the couch…yep, just like family.
So what is a girl to do when she is without internet? Well, Monday there is a care team meeting for my daughter at her hospital. I will write my thoughts on her treatment plan, my own set of nursing diagnosis and goals I think are appropriate. I also have questions about transitional care. What is available and what is appropriate. It is not going to be an easy meeting to get through as I know she is already telling everybody what she thinks they want to hear just so she can get out of there. She needs to understand that she needs goals beyond the hospital doors and that being nearly 18 she needs a secure stable environment to accomplish these goals and to learn independent living skills. Mental health is hard…her age only tells me that we are only beginning the fight of her life. With so many changes coming soon for her she is at a very high risk for relapse of symptoms and suicidal ideations.
The county we live in has the highest per capita suicide rate in the state…welcome to small town America. I hate it here, and am not even a little surprised we have the ‘title.’ There is nothing here except old habits, hurts, hang-ups and nobody is willing to see things for what it is…this is a stagnant population. Although industry is booming, the city itself has no desire whatsoever to expand the population. They actively prevent population growth with zoning laws and red tape.
I’m not suggesting that moving would solve all of our problems, but it would definitely be a step in the right direction as far as removing that element from her life. She needs to see that there is more to life than what is right in front of her. She needs to understand that she needs to be where she is happy, not where somebody else tells her she is supposed to be happy.